It’s almost over. National Novel Writing Month. Did you do it? Think about it at least? For years I’ve thought about it. Watched a friend try and succeed each November.
And this year…. it’s almost over. 6 more days.
Goal: 50,000 words.
I’m just under 43,000.
It’s going to happen.
I’ve put off even writing this post until now for a reason. I’ve been too busy confronting all the doubts that go with a big undertaking. Why is it that until a certain point in every book – at LEAST 150 pages in, I still very much doubt I’ll ever finish writing it? Doubt doesn’t just creep in and whisper, “you’ll never finish, Kelsey. It stinks. Every word. Or at least, every third word… really…. stinks….” My brand of Doubt yells. And it keeps yelling. Until the pages stack up so high that it’s impossible for me to take it seriously any longer.
I wonder if that point in time – the point at which Doubt shuts up – is negotiable. If I thought it would change once I’d written a book or two – or published a book or two… well. No. It didn’t. It’s as loud and persistent as ever, and every bit as convincing.
At least this month – November – crazy month for all nanowrimoers – the pages stack up extra fast and that point of Doubt stopping all its yelling… comes that much faster.
11:50 pm
Hi Kelsey,
I do not know your real name, but I hope that you got used to Kelsey by now.
I bought your book on amazon. I am not sure if I will like it. Your book has only four reviews and is expensive in comparison to other books. I could not get the book from the library or for cheaper price. Lynnette Boner has recommended your book to me. It is hard to make me laugh, so hopefully it will be worth the money I paid. I was hesitant to buy your book since it is also less than 200 pages. I will let you know how I liked it when I get a chance to read it.
You seem to have a nice family and seem to be a nice person. I think that some things are made up by you and not real. I can not believe some things that you said.
4:14 am
Hi Anna,
Yes. Well. Kelsey IS my real name, it’s the Kilgore part that is fictitious. So I’m quite used to the Kelsey part by now, but thank you. It would be odd to get used to a new first name – very observant.
I understand your reservations about my book, and thank you so much for buying it anyway. I’m honored to be published with Oaktara – a fairly new and still small Christian publisher dedicated to Christian fiction and its writers. I imagine the cost difference you noticed could be a result of the size of publisher. The length of book is my fault entirely, though. Did you know there are these equations that convert # of manuscript pages into what you can expect to be the # of book pages. And? I did it wrong. Like an idiot. Math is not my thing. I fully expected it to be much longer, and there you have it. Lesson learned.
You know what….? I kinda don’t think you will like it though. Of course, I hope you do – but I’m thinking not.
I’m the sort of person who looks for the opportunity to laugh at most anything. It’s a coping strategy. It’s a life strategy I’m fond of. It’s just how I’m happiest.
And you seem WAY skeptical. I like it that you tell it like it is. Not enough people are like that.
I’m so glad it’s not my job to *make* you, or anyone else laugh. See? I’d be an awful comedian. I’m just here to live my life the best I can and to record the parts I want to – and I choose to do that in a way that sometimes I happen to find humorous. And if you don’t…? No biggie. Click away, or find another author blog who YOU find funny, and my feelings aren’t hurt at all.
I don’t know if I’m a nice person. Most of the time, I really don’t think so. I think life is EASIER for me when people don’t like me or think I’m nice, so I usually don’t go out of my way to convince them that I am. (Ever ask the meanest mother at PTA to run a bake sale…? Of course not.) And that’s wrong of me. I know. But my family is VERY nice.
So some things you think are made up and not real…? Hmm. I can understand that. My life is crazy. My kids are weird. My husband is kinda strange, but in a genius kinda way. Also, if you’re not from around here, then that’s another bit of culture shock. West Texas is unlike any other place, and so are the wonderful people in the general public I have the privilege of running into. At least a few times a week I whisper out loud, “That did NOT just happen…” or “He did NOT just say that…” I’m in shock, too, about the things that go on around here, and I’m living it.
I will tell you that the REALLY crazy stuff — the stuff I don’t think anyone would believe, or the stuff that is too crazy for me to WANT to record… I don’t. That’s the stuff I never write. That’s the stuff I want to forget. That’s the stuff that is really hard to find humorous. This isn’t a complete picture, it’s just a few sidenotes I’m taking down as I go.
You’re welcome to join me, if you wish – or not. And welcome to tell it like it is. I’m big on that.
Thanks for taking the time to write, Anna.
Kelsey
4:15 am
it’s not 4:14 am. no idea what’s up with that.
6:58 pm
[...] And then someone came along and wrote a brief, but very forthright and honest and real summary of he… after spending some time on this, and another, site. And it wasn’t obscene. Or offensive. And she made some REALLY good points. Even said some nice stuff. [...]
10:33 pm
I just took a whoopin’ from some readers who don’t like me. Your response to Anna made me laugh, made my day, and then some. I’m a new reader, just enjoyin’ your stuff.